Forgotten Blogs

Where is my brain? Is it true that your brain shrinks when you're pregnant and if so, does it shrink each time you are pregnant?  If that's the case, four pregnancies, three to term, does not make for good brain power. I used to spend my days thinking in Facebook status updates. Now I think in terms of blog posts. The problem is, if I don't right it down immediately, it's gone. I will be washing dishes and think of a great post idea and even better post title. Instead of stopping what I'm doing to write the idea down, I think to myself...how could you ever forget an idea like that. Cut to 20 minutes later and it's gone. Either it was a forgettable idea or I simply have lost my marbles. My husband constantly tries to convince me to go to a shared digital calendar. I don't know what's wrong with my magnetic white board calendar on the fridge. It's right there when I go to get milk out for my coffee in the morning. If I can't remember a great idea, how am I supposed to remember to check my digital calendar. What keeps me going...the fact that my kids are sponges and can remember the important things for me if I tell them.

Mommy Time Out

I have recently heard of a great thing...a "mommy time out". We put our kids in time out, at least I do, when they need a moment to regroup or think about their behavior. For a short amount of time, they sit in their room or in a corner and need to be quiet. Why didn't I think of this myself. No one needs a time out more than Moms! We need a time to sit quietly and think about our behavior and regroup. I never thought I would yell at my kids. I just didn't see myself as a yeller. Boy was I wrong. My house is loud and half of that is me yelling at them to listen to me. Sometimes I even yell at them to stop yelling. Isn't that what they call a "do as I say, not as I do" moment? So when in conversation with other mommy friends, the topic of a mommy time out came up, I couldn't believe I hadn't thought of it. Instead of banishing them to their room, I should sentence myself to a little solitary confinement. Check the doors to make sure they are locked, make sure no one is eating so no choking occurs, and then give a warning that mommy is putting herself in time out for 30 seconds, 3 minutes, 10 minutes. Whatever the situation calls for. Keep one ear to the door to make sure everyone is safe and one hand on that glass of wine you poured right before calling it. What keeps me going...the lock on my bedroom door.   

Nothing to fear but fear itself.

I really hate not knowing things. In business, in parenting, in life...I fear what I don't know. I would consider myself a bit of a control freak. I usually want to do things myself so I know it's done right. Or, at least it's done in the exact way I want it to be...which is the right way of course. But there are certain thing that I want to be able to do myself but have absolutely no idea where to begin. Sometimes I rely on the internet being the answer to everything. If I don't know something, I assume I can just Google it and learn how. Boy is that not true. Sure I can find good information but there is usually so much that it's overwhelming and often contradicting. Take, for example, improving my website SEO. I don't have the money to pay someone to do it for me so I'm trying to learn how to do it on my own. The problem is, I don't even understand what half the terminology means so how am I expected to execute any of the things they tell me to do. At my daughter's t-ball practice this week, she accidentally put her glove on the wrong hand. When asked about it by the coach, I could see her head slowly fall and from 30 feet away I knew tears were imminent. As I thought, the second the coach was done showing her the right way, she burst into tears. He looked over at me in the bleachers with panic on his face. I should mention that Ella is one of only two other girls on an all boys team so the coach was very confused by this response. She came off the field and I tried telling her over and over again that it was ok not to know how to do something and that's why she was there learning. It was so easy for me to say that to her. It was so easy for me to tell her it was ok to forget or not know. As I watched her walk back on the field and finish out the practice with no more tears, I felt a sense of sadness combined with pride. I was really sad that she felt embarrassed or not knowledgeable. I knew exactly how she felt but there I was telling her it was ok. I was so proud of her for getting out there in the first place when she hasn't played before and I was even prouder that she got back out there after her meltdown. I'm not sure I would have even gone out there in the first place out of fear of failing. Sometimes I wonder if I am getting in my own way of making UnderBib Baby a success. I fear failing so I hold back. I should follow the lead of my daughter. She pulled herself together and went right back to work. What keeps me going...facing fears.

www.TheUnderBib.com 

My Way Out

I recently did some additional safety testing on my UnderBibs. It was something I was dreading because baby and children's products are held to such a high standards and it's also just another cost to put out. I knew they were safe for every day use but never having gone through the testing process before, I didn't know what to expect. I got my package together and put it in the mail and tried to put it out of my mind. It only took about a week to get the results back and when I saw my "results" email from the testing company, I held my breath. I opened it and scrolled through as quickly as possible and discovered the bibs passed all testing. You would think I would be jumping up and down. I thought I would be jumping up and down. It was like waiting for a college acceptance letter, I anticipated running around the house like an excited child. It was a strange reaction and I felt it immediately. My husband said to me, "do you think you were hoping for a way out?" It hit me, maybe I was hoping for a way out. It's hard to start a business. It's hard every day knowing how much more I need to do to make it a success. It is going to take so much time and a lot more money. At times, I wish I never started this journey. But not matter how tough it gets, I just can't bring myself to stop moving forward no matter how slow the steps are. I don't know if I need to prove it to myself or others but I just can't seem to let it go. I wanted a way out, an excuse to allow myself to stop. It would have been like starting from scratch and I could make an argument for why I just couldn't go back to the beginning. So when I saw "PASSED" for each category tested, a little part of me was sad. No way out. I must keep going. I am disappointed in myself for even hoping for an excuse to end things. After reflecting on it for a couple days, I still have a bit of dread for trudging forward but I have also come to appreciate the fact that I created a product from the ground up and that I did it right. What keeps me going...there is no way but forward so onwards I go.

And so it begins

I knew the day was going to come when after school activities would rule our lives. I will be honest, I have not looked forward to that day. I have always had my kids in various classes and have enjoyed taking them but I understood that the "mommy and me" classes would end and the taxi driving would begin. Today, Ella has her first t-ball practice. I think she is going to love it. At least I hope she loves it. She is good at so many things and I love watching her get excited and participate in an activity. I've never been a very competitive person though so it's hard for me to want anything more than for her to have a good time. She doesn't need to win, she doesn't even need to play well, she just needs to have a good time while trying her best. But are our lives going to be consumed with practices and games? As it is, she has a dance class after school one day a week. Now she will have a t-ball practice after school another day a week and games on Saturdays. And this is one child. What happens when my boys start getting into activities? What will life look like then? Beside madness that is. This is the reason we become parents though. We want to see our kids grow, learn, develop, and experience things through their eyes. Nothing is more beautiful or interesting than seeing it through your child's eyes. What keeps me going...the hope that these activities help make them well rounded individuals and that they will, as adults, appreciate that they were exposed to so many new things.